July 23, 2013

The Single Girl Diaries - Are you a girl worth waiting for?

One of my favorite stories in the Bible is about Jacob saw Rachel. Jacob saw Rachel for the first time and wept because he knew that she was the one he wanted to marry. He ended up working 14 years for her father just so he could have her and it says that "it only seemed like a few days, he loved her so much."{:ready, all together…1-2-3 AWWWWWWWW:}  This stuff is better than the Notebook.  You can get the whole story in Genesis 29:9-30.

Last week I wrote a post about being marriage material. At the end I asked if you were a girl worth marrying. I put a few questions to ask yourself in there, but thought I would expand on that thought a little here in the first weekly post of The Single Girl Diaries. I mean if you want a Jacob, you have to be a Rachel. {:No not the one from Friends, but don't feel bad my mind went there too. I'll be there for you, like I've been there before, I'll be there for you. . .and you'll be there for me too oops rabbit trail:} 

If you want a Jacob you have to…

Go on with yo' bad self. Thank goodness you can't actually hear me say these words because I clearly need more pigmentation in my skin to have them sound the way they do in my head. Moving on. When  Rachel met Jacob for the first time she was shepherding sheep. Now maybe I am wrong and I didn't go and Google research this but I don't remember another time in the Bible where a female is referred to as a shepherd. To me this means Rachel wasn't laying abounding waiting for a man to do what God had called her to do. She was actively per suing her life's destiny without a man {:and doing as a single woman what was normally considered a man's job didn't intimidate her:} and because of it ended up meating her future husband, Jacob.

Rachels obedience to Gods calling and will for her life led her to her husband. Don't be disillusioned in thinking you cannot per sue what God has for you without a spouse. I have committed to myself that I will not marry someone I see potential in. I will only marry someone who is walking out that potential in their lives; therefore I need to be doing the same or why else would a man like Jacob notice me? It is a two way street ladies.

Have accountability in your life. The moment Rachel realized she and Jacob had feelings for each other  "she ran and told her father." Let's be honest with ourselves, we are women and our emotions and feelings can run wild with us. Most of us in Rachel's position wouldn't be running for help and guidance as soon as we realized the man of our dreams, the man who has everything on "our list" and more, has feelings for us in return. Instead we would dump our sheep off on the next able body and run away with him into the sunset. 

I love that at the moment that Rachel realized there might be potential for a relationship with Jacob she ran and told someone else who would hold her accountable. Someone she knew loved her, had wisdom, and had her absolute best interest at heart. Rachel told her father, but my point isn't that you have to tell your parents but rather that it is a good idea  to surround yourself with wise people, mostly girlfriends, who aren''t afraid to tell you more than what you want to hear. Girlfriends who will ask questions and poke around in your business some, not for the sake of prying but for the sake of helping you to guard and protect your heart. We all know the worst feeling in the world is giving your heart away to someone who was never meant to have it. 

Be patient. Patience should have only four letters and the punishment for speaking this word should be a bar of soap in your mouth for no less than 30 min.  I don't even want to write about this one because I hate it so much! Let's be honest being patient sucks. 

In the Bible it never really comes out and says that Rachel has feelings for Jacob, but for my own purposes I am going to pretend she does. Waiting without any potential prospects for a husband is hard, but knowing who your husband is and having to see him everyday working around your house while knowing you can't be with him -  now thats pure torture. And for 14 years at that!

I am not going to act like I am some awesome single girl who has mastered the art of waiting because its not even close to true. This is definitely the one area I need the most work in. So I will keep my explanation brief on the topic: It's difficult to wait, but more difficult to regret. Don't give up on what you want most for what you want now.

{:This is where my parallel with Rachel stops but I have more so I'll continue:}

Stop being so needy.The girl who needs a husband is the on who isn't prepared for a husband. I haven't been married, but I have been in relationships enough to know that our one day husbands will let us down, our husbands will make us mad, and let's be honest we will probably think about inflicting bodily harm on them at least once in our marriage. If you go into a marriage thinking your husband will make you happy forever, you'll never have another lonely day, and he will never let you down; you are setting yourself up for a huge disappointment because you're wanting him to fill a position that only Jesus can in your life. Jesus is the one who won't just make you happy, but give you a spirit of joy that even in the darkest moments you can grasp on to. Jesus is the one who will never leave your side and make sure you never walk alone.And Jesus is the only one who will never disappoint you. Jesus - not your future husband. If we can get this one right now girls, our marriages will be better and stronger for it because we won't put a burden on our husband of living up to a standard only Jesus can fulfill. 

I could keep going, but I don't want to write about too many things for you to think about that you become overwhelmed with so much you need to transition in your life that you don't apply any of this. You might find one area you need to work on, or you might need to work on them all. Whatever and how many ever it is know that you cannot change this alone. We can willpower through and change these things but doing it out of our own strength will only last a few months. If we choose to change these things through the power of Christ it then revolutionizes the way we live, both in our single season and our coming married season too. 

I'm with you girls in this and I'm praying for you.

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  1. I seriously LOVE this post!! It is perfect and such a great reminder of things that I seem to look over or let just "slip" past me at times! I agree that patience is probably one of the hardest out of all of these. Thanks for the post!

    1. I'm so glad it helped. I have to admit that I wrote it more as a reminder to myself so I'm glad other people are finding it useful.


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