June 2, 2014

The Good in Goobye

One of the hardest things to do after a break up is to actually break up. Watching the other person walk out of your life whether by your choice, their choice, or a mutual decision, is a tough thing. They are going from a huge part of you world, to just another person in your world-if that. Being sad and missing that person is perfectly normal, but that missing them feeling doesn't mean breaking up wasn't the right thing to do.

I had a boyfriend in college who treated me like a princess. He went out of his way on a daily basis to make me smile and make my life easier. We lived in the same dorm building and he would run down and change my laundry from the washer to the dryer just so I wouldn't have to walk down a flight of stairs. He would have guys nights and bring me back something just because he said he wanted to make me smile. He was a baseball player and I was a cheerleader so a lot of nights our practices schedules would conflict with each others which would make it difficult for us to see each other, but almost without fail I would come into my dorm room to a sweet note slid under the door. "Awe," right? He seems perfect! Only problem was, he wasn't my perfect. I knew he was far more into the relationship than I would ever be. We were just on two different pages of what we wanted at that point in our lives. He was older than me and ready for something serious. I was a freshman in college and just recently out of a long relationship. So I had to end it with the guy that treated me like every girl dreams of being treated, because my heart just wasn't in it. I remember being heartbroken over breaking up with him. I had this pit in my stomach wondering if I did the right thing. 

Looking back now, I realize how absolutely normal those feelings are. Luckily, I never acted on those feelings of "maybe I did the wrong thing." I wish I had been that strong every break up, but I wasn't. I have done what every girl has done, you break up, but continue to talk and text and then eventually get back together. All too often this story ends with you being in the very same place again a month later, because the reason you ended things in the first place is often still there. 

I know what you're thinking, "but what if things can change and things do work out." Yes, that does happen, but rarely. After a breakup we act out of our sadness and end up prolonging our sadness instead. Endings are sad, but you can't have new beginnings without endings. The good in goodbye, is that you are one step closer to meeting the one you won't have to say goodbye to.

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1 comment:

  1. I love this..
    I do think its hard to have goodbyes but I also know that yes there is good in goodbyes as well...
    He sounded like a perfect gentleman! I am sure he made someone super happy :)


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