July 26, 2015

I Just Can't Be Bothered

People in Australia say a lot of weird stuff. They have some how twisted and turned the English language to the point that they no longer speak the same language. They call it English; I call it Australian. 
They call a sweater a jumper, a marker a texter, the car trunk the boot, and the restroom the toilet. 
One of the phrases that really caught me off guard when I would hear the Aussies say it is "I can't be bothered." And they would say it about the most random things. 
One day, very early on when I was here, I was with my roommates and we were out purchasing stuff for the house. One of the things we really needed was a refrigerator. It was about 5 in the afternoon, we had been out all day, and the man who had a few refrigerators for us to look at called. We were talking about going to see them and I remember my Aussie roommate saying "I just don't know if I can be bothered to do that tonight."
Uh excuse me? Come again. 
Maybe I am high maintenance and all but I like cold food. And while I came here to get many things {:wisdom, growth, new friendships...:} salmenella was not one of them. Thanks.
What do you mean you can't be bothered?!
In essence what she was saying is: "It has been a long day. I am tiered and I really just don't want to, but I will."
"I just can't be bothered" is actually one of the phrases I have grown quite fond of since being here. It is one of the few phrases/words I have allowed into my ENGLISH vocabulary. 
While I am now quite fond of the phrase, I think we all take this "I can't be bothered" attitude far too often when it comes to people's situations and our passing of judgment over them. 
It's easy to judge someone. It takes zero effort to hear or see a person or people in situations and make a snap judgment about why they are in that circumstance or why what they are doing is completely ridiculous and wrong. But it takes time, effort, and energy to understand a persons circumstances and situations. It requires taking time to have a conversation or conversations. It takes a lot of effort and energy to listen and keep all your geniusness in that brain of yours. I takes time for them to trust you enough to tell you the back story.
People who pass judgement in essence say a lot more about themselves than they do the people they are judging. They in essence are telling everyone else "I can't be bothered." 
They can't be bothered enough to sit down and hear what got them to this place.
They can't be bothered in hearing something that might make them change their opinion.
They can't be bothered with someone telling them something that might make them stand corrected in their judgment. 
They just cant be bothered with people, they have to much judgment to pass.
{:I am using "they" because there is no way you or I would ever be that they. *GASP* No. Never.:}

Recently, I have had some people ask me my thoughts on Caitlyn {:aka Bruce Jenner:} and her recent change. Honestly, I don't have much of an opinion and don't know that I ever will. My reasoning in that is I have never even seen her to say hello much less have a conversation with her. You may say "but she has done interviews." Sure she has, but the media can portray whatever they want and can ask her any questions they choose and the questions they choose are the ones that will evoke the most drama and gasps by the viewers. But what about the more mundane questions about Caitlyn's relationship with her mom and dad when she was younger. What about the thing that boy said on the playground that one day. The media can show or not show whatever they want and a tv interview special will never give me the right to judge. My opinion is never complete without the complete story. And opinions in general are like armpits. Everyone has them and they usually stink.:} Situations and circumstances never stand independently. It is always about the person, the unique and individual person with a story.
Judgment says "I cant be bothered" but spending the time, energy, and effort to engage with a person going through  a questionable circumstance or situation says "I care far more about the person than the circumstance." 
There are a lot of things I just cant be bothered to do today, like cooking a proper meal, organizing my closet, or alphabetizing my spice rack, but the one thing I can be bothered by is taking the time, energy, and effort to see people and not situations. 
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