March 9, 2016

Mr. Personality or Mr. Popularity

In last week's post about difficulties of dating within the Church I shared with you that one of my courses this semester in school is Marriage and Family. I am loving this course and the absolute wisdom our instructors are pouring out. It is like finding gold without even having to dig for it...they are just freely handing it over.

Each week, after the lecture, I have a smaller class with only about 16 of us in it where we talk through, debate, mull over the topic of the class that week to gain a better understanding of it and and where our convictions lie.

We were on the subject of dating the other week and my instructor turned to one of the married couples in our class and she said "as a married woman, what are your thoughts."

My classmate leaned forward in her chair and said "I think girls are more interested in dating and marrying Mr. Popularity than they are Mr. Personality."

She went on to explain how her husband, who was sitting right next to her, was hardly what she was looking for. She had absolutely no idea why she said yes to him on a date but somehow she did. On that date she realized that for all this time in her search for Mr. Right she had been more concerned with catching the eye of the popular guy that she forgot that just being herself would catch the eye of the right guy.

That statement resounded with me and challenged me. Am I looking for Mr. Popularity or Mr. Personality. Would I rather him be noticed by everyone and loved by everyone even if it means I have to live in a constant state of questioning myself - Am I good enough for him? Am I living up to the expectations of what it looks like to dat Mr. Popular? Or, would I rather find Mr. Personality who things click with, are easy with, and I am fully myself with.

ORRRR can you have Mr. Popularity and Mr. Personality all at once? I don't know the answer to this. I almost feel a bit Carrie Bradshaw-esqu as I peck away on my keyboard with my single girl wonderings. So maybe rather than bring you what I think is the answer, I'll just throw the question out to you...

Can you have Mr. Popularity and Mr. Personality? Or are we missing some of the greatest guys because we are hyper focused on Mr. Popular?

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